I have found my self challenged daily to trust the Lord lately. My heart is sad that the wear and tear of life has taken me further and further from trusting God. I continually try to remember all the blessings we have been given. We have an amazing, healthy, happy, laughing, smiling baby boy who takes my breath away every time that I look at him. I have a loving, giving, helping, wonderful husband who is helping me around the house as we get ready for our adventure to move 10 hours away to Tennessee. My husband has a wonderful family that loves us and that wants to spend time with us and that is so excited for us to move to Tennessee. And though I have been nervous about moving to a small town in Tennessee I am excited too! We have been seriously lacking in good church fellowship since we moved to Lincoln. Being on staff with a Christian ministry was difficult because it felt like whenever we went to church we were expected to lead something, teach something, or start something. We didn’t have time to devote to investing in the relationships of the people around us because we were so busy and overloaded with the college students that we worked with. We have been SO HUNGRY for relationships of people our age. So I am also excited to move to Tennessee because we found a church fellowshipjackson.com where it looks like it is just something we are looking for and is a sister church to Fellowship Memphis which is the church in which we hope to one day be invovled in when we finally move to Memphis. I am SO wanting to be fed for a change, be in a small group and share life with people. It always helps to hear what others are going through and what is helping them make it through.
Sometimes I feel like every step I take my world is crumbling around me. I have contemplated that perhaps I am just not the best problem solver and maybe others handle their stresses much better. I am daily trying to give up my burdens to the Lord. I often have to do it even minute by minute. My heart continues to ache as many of those so dear to me ie. family members make decisions that are taking more and more pieces of their heart away from the Lord. I feel as though sometimes I have the tendency to do the same and I do not want to leave that legacy to my children. Oh, Lord have mercy on us.
Here are a few things that I am praying for an added measure of faith for:
– That God would draw our hearts deeper with him
– That we would connect to a church in Tennessee quickly and find instant friendships even more quickly
– Our home to sell in the next few weeks
– That God would help us recover the debt we’ve gotten into quickly due to transitions and job struggles
– That our move will go smoothly to Tennessee and everything will work out with the job my husband is taking with this library and that he will have doors swing wide open for him for the Chamber of Commerce job he so wants
– That God would renew and awaken the hearts of my parents and siblings
Thank you Lord ahead of time for what you will do. Please increase my faith.